Lotion

The recipe shown below for lotion has no chemistry involved. If you haven't been able to tell by now, I really like chemistry, so to be honest, this lotion is a bit of a disappointment.

But the important thing to remember here is that this lotion works. The first time you use it, you're going to think you took a whole trip to the store and maybe even mingled amongst hippies to get the ingredients, only to find that the lotion makes your skin feel greasy.

And it does. For like a minute. Maybe 2. But the waxy, greasy feeling subsides and then your skin will feel rejuvenated better than any commercially bought lotion ever could.

The only down-side to this recipe is what I've already stated: you have to go to a store like Fresh Thyme or Trader Joe's in order to find these ingredients. And it is kind of pricey, too. But once you buy them, they last. This is defintely worth the investment.

There are two recipes listed below. One is for use during the day, and one is right before bed. The difference is subtle, and frankly it won't matter which you use when. It's just that peppermint is a slight stimulant and lavender and chamomile are calmative. Use your best judgement.

Do NOT use plastic to make anything here. It's not that you can't, but metal, glass, and teflon are significantly easier to clean with these ingredients.

Daytime Recipe

Hardware Software
  • Stove
  • Teflon-coated pot
  • Quart-sized glass jar
  • Immersion Blender
  • Wide-mouth jelly jar with lid
  • 1 cup non-chlorinated water
  • * 1/2 cup oil
  • 1/2 cup beeswax
  • 10-15 drops peppermint essential oil
  • 10-15 drops eucalyptus essential oil
  • 2-3 tsp Vitamin E Acetate

Nighttime Recipe

Hardware Software
  • Stove
  • Teflon-coated pot
  • Quart-sized glass jar
  • Immersion Blender
  • Wide-mouth jelly jars with lids
  • 1 cup strong brewed chamomile tea
  • * 1/2 cup oil
  • 1/2 cup beeswax
  • 15-20 drops lavender essential oil
  • 2-3 tsp Vitamin E Acetate
Instructions
1. Into the pot, add the oil, beeswax, and Vitamin E Acetate. Put on the stove on medium-low heat until all the wax melts.
2. Once the wax/oil is completely melted, pour it all into the jar.
3. Heat the water like you were going to make tea (no more than 170°F, no less than 150°F).
4. Use the immersion blender to constantly blend the contents of the jar.
5. Continue blending and VERY slowly, pour in the hot water. This process will make the contents of the jar very difficult to blend. Get creative. Just don't break anything and don't lose a finger.
6. Once the water is fully integrated (will turn white and creamy, like a very thick pudding), continue blending and add in the essential oils.
7. Once the essential oils are integrated, add the lotion to the jelly jars. Because you're using oils that can spoil, store this oil out of the sunlight, and not in a hot place. A refrigerator works, but a cupboard will also work.
 
Instructions
1. Into the pot, add the oil, beeswax, and Vitamin E Acetate. Put on the stove on medium-low heat until all the wax melts.
2. Meanwhile, make the (strong) chamomile tea.
3. Once the wax/oil is completely melted, pour it all into the jar.
4. Use the immersion blender to constantly blend the contents of the jar.
5. Continue blending and VERY slowly, pour in the hot tea. This process will make the contents of the jar very difficult to blend. Get creative. Just don't break anything and don't lose a finger.
6. Once the water is fully integrated (will turn white and creamy, like a very thick pudding), continue blending and add in the lavender oil.
7. Once the lavender oil is integrated, add the lotion to the jelly jars. Because you're using oils that can spoil, store this oil out of the sunlight, and not in a hot place. A refrigerator works, but a cupboard will also work.

* You can pretty much pick your own preference of oil here. I'd highly recommend not using coconut oil or any sort of lard, tallow, or any palm-based oils, as they are solids at room temperatuure, and it's helpful to be a liquid. Also, don't get "Vegetable" Oil. That's a lame pre-mixed oil that varies from store to store. The best oils are the ones that don't smell unusual. I'd suggest Sunflower, Safflower, Avocado, Grapeseed, or even something like Olive or Canola.

Beware of allergies. If you use nut oils like peanut oil or walnut oil, you could put someone in the hospital with a mere handshake. Be courteous: don't use nut oils.